iamhyperlexic

Contemporary short fiction, poetry and more

Gig review: The Beat, Picturedrome, Holmfirth 20 July 2013.

So Larraine and I met up at Sparrow Bar in Bradford on Friday evening and we had a few drinks of light pilsner it was nice and refreshing in the hot weather and we were downstairs where it was cooler and eventually Michael and his mates turned up and there was one mate who looked Asian with a very broad Bradford accent and kept interrupting and Andy whom I have met before and is all right and Anthony to whom I took an instant dislike but I didn’t care I just got on with it and Larraine did too we went to a pub called the Sun Inn which is a gay pub Larraine challenged a lesbian to a game of pool and lost on the black we went back to Larraine’s house which is near Bradford and we got some wine and beer on the way I asked Larraine if she would like to go to see The Beat the following day and she said yes we went through some vinyl records and each said if we owned it and if so how we had bought it and what it meant the next day we got the train from Bradford to Halifax and I realised that I know Halifax quite well because of going there with Gaia Holmes and I asked Larraine if she wanted to go for a drink at The Railway which is a very nice pub and we went to the Railway and had a couple of drinks I know the people who run it they recognised me and asked how I was and said hello we sat in the same place that Gaia and Simon Crump and I had been sitting when we met Robin Simons and we all know what happened that time we got a taxi to Holmfirth the Picturedrome venue was really good really nice staff I went up to the guy on the door and gave my name having bought two tickets on the internet he said you’re in that was it the bar was nice with real ale the band which was on when we arrived I don’t know their name but they were an up-tempo ska outfit two of the band members looked like metal-heads with beards and pony-tails the “frontman” was a very attractive-looking transgender person with pink Dr Marten’s black tights and black minidress and pink hair I checked her out after the set when she was going to a merchandise stall I was going to ask her for a snog or her telephone number but I saw the ginger hair on her arms and it put me off and so I did not go any further Larraine and I went outside so that Larraine could smoke and we could drink beer while looking at the river it was lovely the bouncers were really reasonable you had to go out at the front and go in again at the back but you could take your plastic glass outside we heard The Beat start up and we went back inside and we were really near the front Larraine got worked up when Ranking Junior took his top off the crowd was fantastic no violence no nastiness just one love one inity the BNP and the EDL are fucked when it comes to Holmfirth because everybody just wants to listen to the riddim and skank it took us a while to get a taxi afterwards we went to a pub called the Shoulder of Mutton and I drank Copper Dragon Pippin and Larraine drank Carling and we played three games of pool Larraine beat me all ends up in the first two games but I won the last one and we went home and had baths because I had been wearing the same clothes for two days and had sweated like nobody’s business when I had been dancing and I sang a song in the bath and Larraine had to go to work the next day and we got a bus to Halifax and we agreed that everything had been a bonus we had had no expectations whatsoever but we had both had A COMPLETE BLAST and that we would do it again some time and although I was looking forward to getting home and taking my salt-stained clothes off I was sad when I saw my friend Larraine walking away because I had been leaning on her for the previous two days she is a very experienced and broad-minded woman and a great person to have as a friend she makes me proud

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3 responses to “Gig review: The Beat, Picturedrome, Holmfirth 20 July 2013.

  1. Chelle Stewart July 23, 2013 at 9:17 am

    reading this was a complete blast

  2. Paul Sharratt August 12, 2013 at 2:16 am

    Well I think its like what you’re doing here is a bit of the following of James Joyce with leaving out of any punctuation like he does in Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man but not like in Dubliners which is earlier it’s like he started out normal and then got weird and I know I’m already drunk as I type this and so it won’t make as much sense as it should and I’ve probably read it all out of context and you weren’t even thinking of Joyce as you wrote at all but yeah why is it Larraine with an A and not Lorraine with a O

  3. wthirskgaskill August 12, 2013 at 2:30 am

    I most certainly was thinking of James Joyce and also of Joan Jobe Smith with the leaving out of punctuation and as for Larraine not Lorraine it is just one of those things you should meet her some time she was born in Canada and used to live in Cornwall she is a massive weirdo.

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