Much was made in the last episode of ‘Sherlock’ about the fact that Irene Adler appeared naked. Since she had no sleeves, no cuffs, no shoes, no fabric, no stains, no worn patches, she gave nothing to Sherlock (as we are now calling him). This is ridiculous.
The excellent writers of ‘Sherlock’ are cynically yanking our chain about Sherlock’s apparent sexual ineptitude.
The laws of common sense, which Sherlock applies in such incredibly detailed ways, do not cease to apply when we get within a few centimetres of the clitoris.
I can tolerate the idea that this Sherlock has never slept with a woman in the literal sense (i.e. gone to bed with a woman and spent the whole night with her, including interactions the following morning). But I cannot believe that he would make nothing out of a woman’s naked body (from a detective rather than erotic point of view).
This is what I think would have gone through Sherlock’s mind instead of those inept and inarticulate question marks.
Tattoos? None. Allies herself with the world of BDSM, but no tattoos. Inference: cynical manipulator: content for others to be damaged or damage themselves, but will not participate in it herself.
Stretch-marks? None. Not given birth. Never been morbidly obese. No scars: hence: no breast enhancement or other cosmetic surgery.
Figure. Underweight for her demographic. Inference: since there is no apparent sign of metabolic disorder, she must feel vulnerable. Possession of a full figure would not in any way make her occupation more difficult, and hence the constant dieting must be self-imposed.
Pubic hair: no data (Sherlock would have had, but I was not standing next to him).
Underarm hair: no data (regrettable, since the possession of which is such a strong statement in this day and age).
Toenails: no data.
Fingernails: no data.
Hair: insufficient data.
Body odour: Sherlock gleaned nothing, which is unrealistic. Either she was perfumed, implying recent bathing, massage, and so forth, or she smelt natural, which implies more.
Nudity: an exhibitionistic statement by a risk-taker who allows herself to be too much swayed by the alleged abilities of other agencies.
Conclusion: the inestimable writers of ‘Sherlock’ have undersold themselves. This would not have happened. You boys, consider yourselves to have been docked 0.05 marks.