My name is Katy. I am a psychiatric nurse, and I work most weekends as an Elvis impersonator. Today is Saturday, but I am having a day off. I’ve got a hot date.
I was doing a performance at a civil partnership ceremony at a pub hotel in Batley. I looked at one of the brides, and instantly fell for her. She was gorgeous: really girly, lovely face; long, treacle-blonde hair; curvy figure; long, slender fingers. She was wearing a white silk dress which she wore very well. I was smitten.
I can’t remember what the other one looked like, except that she was out of her league.
When I started my act, I could not help myself. I am known for generating a lot of audience participation (or embarrassing people, depending on personality and blood-alcohol level). I couldn’t keep myself away from her. I didn’t touch her at first, but every-one in the room could see that I was making this bride in the dress the centre of attention.
I usually start with the up-tempo numbers: A Little Less Conversation, and Jailhouse Rock (which was appropriate, going by the number of women there who were guards at New Hall prison). Then I usually go into Heartbreak Hotel, and then slow it down a bit. When I started Are You Lonesome Tonight, I knelt on the floor on front of her, in my white calf-skin suit and rhinestone-studded white cowboy boots, and I held her hand. She kept glancing from me to the other bride, and back again. And she smiled at me. And every minute or so she gave a cute little giggle, as if she was embarrassed to be having so much fun.
I’m meeting her at 1 o’clock at Dewsbury station. We were going to have a few drinks, and then see where it goes.
I don’t think of myself as a heart-breaker, or a home-wrecker. I don’t feel bad about this. I mean, if she fell for me at her own wedding, it can’t have been a good idea for her go to go through with the civil partnership, can it?